Official IS hottie Heather needs a new assistant at her too-cool PR firm.
If you are
*smart
*fashion obsessed
*willing to drink in the office
*dedicated
*addicted to Coke Zero
this could be your dream job. Also, you must like perfume and proenza.
email your resume to am.i@imaginarysocialite.com if you’re into it.
[ALEX GAINES - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
In other news, Bea has finally seen the light and started dating an older man.
But where’s Andre?!
[OK NO, BEA AND TIM GUNN ARE NOT DATING. BUT MAYBE HE'S TEACHING HER TO SEW.]
Stephan, 25
Age 7: Stephan sticks a bean in his ear during math class; he has to go to the doctor to get it out.
Age 13: Stephan makes up a song about me to the tune of “She’s Always a Woman.” He sings it during math class. My lunch table repeats it in the caf. I cry.
Age 15: Stephan and his friends sneak into my boarding school for the day. We eat three bowls of ice cream for dinner.
Now: He’s so LA.
[BEN McKENZIE - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Drew says the owner of this Y3 necklace - as seen in Teen Vogue - is “going to fashion hell!”
Is it because…
a) it’s totally fake
b) it’s totally stolen from backstage at their runway show
c) it’s black and orange, hello.
[EMILY MORTIMER - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
This night’s party:
1. Paper Beautiful People @ Hiro. Jake says 2500 people RSVP’d, meaning the odds of meeting an actual beautiful person are considerably better. Odds of getting in? Not so good.
2. Ben Sherman / Raveonettes / Danny Masterson. If you read Vice Magazine, or Elle Girl you will probably be here.
3. Roland Berry @ Bloomies Soho. Because you want that sweatshirt, at left, even before Petty Luxury makes it custom.
4. Alexander McQueen’s Puma launch in the West Village. Which would be good, if he was actually going. Is he? Jordan? Bueller?
[AMANDA CUTTER BROOKS - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
To: am.i@imaginarysocialite.com
From: LittleMermaid@jdate.comOMG. Claude Michel Schonberg is in our office! This is such a theatre nerd’s wet dream!!! He’s a very intensly serious lil’ Frenchman… wearing a fabulously spring-ish striped tangerine and white button-down. Not at ALL what I expected. Hee!
(oh, don’t pretend you’re confused - secretly, you know this is so cool)
[LACEY CHABERT - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
This gorgeous tangle of Chanel, Purcell, and skull chic just happened to be sprawled on the bedroom floor of a certain hyper-music-scenester.
Whose designer mess is this (and what, exactly, was the IS doing on their floor)?
[ELIZABETH BANKS - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
What has the lovely Eleanor dropped on the table?
a) Champagne
b) Chanel
c) A map to Marc Jacobs’ house
d) Her Imaginary Socialite card
A style travesty, any way you read it…
[JULIE ORRINGER - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
To: am.i@imaginarysocialite.com
From: MiuToo@2ndary.comYou seem to be 47th on the wait list for that white eyelit dress. Ouch. Plus I heard a rumor - if you get the dress, you’ll get married in it? For serious?
Um, file this under “whatever” - especially since Nanette Lepore just sent over this gorgeous white eyelit blouse. So close to that dress, yet so very far. And there’s no way I’d get married in it, though I guess I’d wear it to bed for a few seconds…
[HEATHER SWEET - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Marlene, 26.
12:42: “Hi, I’m Marlene, it’s so nice to meet you! I just saw The Arc.”
12:44: “I used to bartend in this small town in Alaska. It is not where I’m from but I used to work at a bar there. I was the only girl. Really in the town. It was crazy, I could meet any guy. And they all drank the same thing so I already knew what they wanted, really.”
12:45: “What is your name again? I’m Marlene.”
[NATASHA SINGER - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
And yes, I’ve read New York’s story on non-adulthood this week, and yes, it’s disturbing I would date allll those guys despite the Bugaboos. But this paragrah struck a wrong chord:
“It’s about the mom in the low-slung Sevens and ankle boots and vaguely Berlin-art-scene blouse with the $800 stroller and the TV-screen-size Olsen-twins sunglasses perched on her head walking through Bryant Park listening to Death Cab for Cutie on her Nano.”
Whoa. Hold Up. Someone still wearing Sevens is directional enough for ankle boots?
I don’t think so. Try vintage Helmut Langs from a New Mexico thrift store.
[DAVID AMSDEN - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
A Veneta vendeta!
[ROB CALDWELL - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Why is Quinn cleaning up The Fashion Ghetto?
a) The fashion police nabbed her for wearing no pants
b) It’s the only way Gurj would give her a mix CD
c) She’s actually starring in a Teen Vogue photo shoot…
d) Duh, it’s Pete Wentz’s apartment.
[LEONA NAESS - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
The Purple Wall, 4 months old
It’s like standing next to the hottest guy on the dance floor, to make your ex jealous.
Except you’re getting photographed.
And there’s nobody else there.
But you get it.
[CAT POWER - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Amidst rumors that Mary Kate and Ashley are launching a magazine for tween boys, this job listing on Mediabistro:
New magazine seeks experienced and creative freelance writers to report and pitch stories of interest to boys ages 8 to 14. Knowledge of sports, action sports, manga, animals, science, gadgets, video games and ”news of the weird” a plus. Ideal candidates will be able to report unique, offbeat stories of interest to the target audience. Please e-mail résumé and writing samples to teenboysmag@aol.com
If you get the job, you could have a crush on your new boss…
[AMY SMART - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]