Stephan, 25
Age 7: Stephan sticks a bean in his ear during math class; he has to go to the doctor to get it out.
Age 13: Stephan makes up a song about me to the tune of “She’s Always a Woman.” He sings it during math class. My lunch table repeats it in the caf. I cry.
Age 15: Stephan and his friends sneak into my boarding school for the day. We eat three bowls of ice cream for dinner.
Now: He’s so LA.
[BEN McKENZIE - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]