We may skip ‘real or fake’ today in favor of this guessing game: whose namesake clutch, designed by Anya Hindermarch, went onsale this weekend for 60% off?
Hints…
*She was asked to be in a Jane fashion spread before she was famous, after Andrea Linnett saw her on the street
*The New Yorker profiled her in their first fashion issue
*She’s been to MisShapes
*Her birthday party was this Saturday at Beatrice.
[FANNY ARDENT - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Cara, 20
Plays with kids
Plays with colors
Plays with her food
Plays hip hop music in her bedroom late at night so she can practice for a Friday night dance routine.
Yes, really, so of course you love her.
[IRINE JACOB - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
I was the smartest girl in the school until I was 8. Then came Cayre. She read faster than me (impossible). She wrote stronger than me (unthinkable). She even excelled in art class, where I unsteadily reigned as the finger paint princess. My one consolation was that she was not invited to make up Paula Abdul dances at recess, and I was the star.
It goes without saying, we never spoke.
Then one day, our names were up on the blackboard. “We must be in trouble,” I told her. She nodded, alarmed. We both tugged our braids; hers were long and black, Indian-princess style and slapping down her back. Mine were blonde and clumped into a bun, “like a movie star,” I had instructed my mother that morning. They both got pulled by boys.
“You’ve been picked,” said The Teacher, “to represent our class at the school reading show. You’ll read a story. Together.”
We both winced; our first act of “together,” but The Teacher didn’t see.
That weekend I went to her house. We were supposed to pick a chapter of a book to read aloud to the school. I wanted Dracula. She wanted Little House on the Prarie. We both wanted, desperately, to quit.
“Let’s go outside,” she said, and of course I was an indoor girl. She handed me a pair of wellies.
“I am not wearing those,” I growled. “Those are ugly.”
“Those,” she shot back, “Are the only thing that keep you dry in the swamp.”
Swamp? Whoa. The only swamp I knew about was in Fraggle Rock.
“It’s behind our house,” she explained, “and I walk in it all the time. You’ll come, unless of course, you’re scared.”
“What I’m scared of,” I snapped back, “Is someone seeing me in those ugly boots.”
But really, the swamp was terrifying. It was huge, which was scary. It was smelly, which was frightful. But the real terror came from its glisten, a slimy sheen of frog backs and fly wings and gunk that slicked the top like germ gloss. Gross.
“Let’s go,” said Cayre, a military command. She marched into the swamp like a duckling and I tried to follow her and I failed. Actually, I flailed. Actually, I fell.
The swamp was unexpectedly freezing, an ice pack of dead grass and chilled slime and cold slugs. My pink dress turned pitch purple and my lungs got shrill from screaming.
Cayre calmly dragged me up, and dragged me out, and dragged me to her parent’s bathtub, where I was drenched in steaming water and handed a fresh pair of pajamas.
“You only wear pink,” she explained, “and these are the only pink things I have… I know,” she groaned, “they’re ugly.”
That’s when I finally stopped crying.
“They are ugly,” I nodded. “They’re terrible.”
“See?” she smiled. “We agree on something. Finally.”
Last year, I bought some Hunter wellies from Scotland. They are not pretty. They are not pink. They are easily my favorite shoes.
[ISABELLE McNALLY - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Kappa is not Kappa… Except, you know, it kind of is…
ps, changed my mind – here’s the Is Not – couldn’t resist.
[HAPPY FRIDAY TO ALL THE SORORITY GIRLS - XOXO]
Today we’re going to forgo an actual Is Not (in the running this week: Pucci is not Gucci; Adam Brody is not Adrien Brody; Anorexia is not Cool) in favor of something more useful:
Your (okay, my) Friends & Family discount at Sephora.com. Just enter the promotional code and voila, you can actually afford that stash of Stella McCartney parfum that you really, really need right now.
So go and get prettified! Not that you weren’t pretty already… I swear…
[PAT McGRATH - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Friday night and everyone’s moving
I can fell the heat, but it’s shooting
Heading down
I search for the beat in this dirty town
[ALISON NIX - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
The Lily Cole crush comes to MySpace, where several accounts under her name have sprung – but she looks to glam in most of the pictures, except this one.
Still, is Lily really so silly as to say “MySpace is a meanie and won’t let me add that little extra 0.5″ to her height?
Well, she may have gotten into Cambridge, but she is only 18…
[DAVID BRESKIN - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Meet the Skinny Musketeers.
Together, they have a combined age of 73.
Together, they conquer random downtown parties and random open bars.
Together, their jeans are still small enough to clothe just one normal person in Nebraska.
Together, they can save the world!
Okay, no, but maybe they can save your Thursday night.
[POOKIE BURCH - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Dear MySpace Girls,
Let’s play a game of good idea / bad idea.
Good Idea: An Ode to Kate Moss, with a slightly sketchy tagline about drugs but whatever, it’s hazy and reckless and very blase and we get it, it’s cool.
Bad Idea: This. Ewwwww.
Please remember, all the cool girls eat (Even Irina! I saw her down a whole plate of Mac & Cheese during Fashion Week! and she is the coolest!)!
[SOPHIE DAHL - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
There are few things more fabulously wrong than an electric pink Marc by Marc tote drowned in zebra print and casually knocking people over at the Diesel pop-up store in Soho.
But one thing that would be more wrong? A FAKE electric pink Marc by Marc tote drowned in zebra print and casually knocking people over at the Diesel pop-up store in Soho.
Save that kind of shit for assaulting girls in your way at H&M.
[DEEPAK CHOPRA - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
More proof that the Casting Director is genius:
Today he posted his V Magazine triumph, where the backpage is totally crammed with people you know and love – and also with their email addresses, so you can productively stalk them.
Take a peek at the sheet and see if you can find…
a) A California t-shirt mogul
b) New York’s most eligible blonde
c) The boy who opens the door at Marc Jacobs
d) Style.com’s model of the minute… hint: she’s from Marilyn
[ALISON McCULLOCH - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Colin, 24
Now that the quotable Cory Kennedy has left us forever, let’s make up a sequel and play “The Quotable Crush” instead. Which is NOT from Colin:
a) “I like Ghandi and Abraham Lincoln a lot.”
b) “I’m fun and funny.”
c) “Jesus, don’t you have anything in the fridge that won’t make be blow up to like 100 lbs.”
d) “Even though I am an adorable and self sufficient adult, I secretly want to be Cory Kennedy.”
(yeah this one is pretty easy)
[BROOKE ALLEN - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Step One: Find yourself in the Young Love video, shot when Dan Keyes and the boys last played Stolen Transmission.
Alternate Step One: Imagine yourself in the Young Love video, shot when Dan Keyes and the boys last played Stolen Transmission.
Step Two: Vote for Young Love so all the TRL kids can see what a real party looks like!
[DR. BRONNER - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
Last night, Lydia Hearst attended the revival of Chicago sporting what out-of-this-world accessory?
a) A necklace that once belonged to Marilyn Monroe
b) A necklace that once was part of Liv Tyler’s Lord of the Rings costume
c) A necklace that once was in the V&A museum during the Princess Di exhibition
d) A necklace that once was her cousin Amanda’s, but she stole it.
[PENELOPE CRUZ - AM I THE IMAGINARY SOCIALITE?]
